I've been up for hours and hours already today and have spent most of that time buried in Internet research. I won't post links because they are particularly distressing but what I've been searching for is precisely how someones dies from biventricular heart failure, what the steps will be and how long it takes.
For anyone who knows me you already know why I have a valid interest in the subject these days but it was hearing my girlie speak yesterday about her latest hospital appointment that really made me think.
I try to bury my head in the sand and not face up to the reality of the imminent departure of the person I love more than life. I guess sometimes that denial doesn't work as well as I'd like.
I just wish all my research had reassured me that she wouldn't be in any pain when the time came. Unfortunately it did not. Emma has already outlived her 'Expected Expiry Date' so every day is now a bonus. I just wish I didn't already miss her so much.
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